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News Room : Misappropriation Bill presented in Parliament of Sovereign Kleptocratic Republic of Chauristan – The Island

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By D. L. Sirimanne

I dreamt I was the Radio Officer on a KLM Super Constellation flight to Colombo with a Dutch crew. Flight Information sent us a ‘red alert’ that Colombo Airport was closed and to divert the flight to Jaffna. I immediately informed the Captain and he accordingly altered heading to Jaffna. I called KKS Approach several times with no success. When the captain heard me calling KKS, he burst into laughter. “Call Jaffna Control, Siri; surely haven’t you flown to Jaffna before?” I said, “Of course Captain, I have flown hundreds of times to KKS on DC3s in the 1950s and knew every bit of the Jaffna peninsula.” Rather amused he said,” But that was 100 years ago Siri, aren’t we in the 2050s now?” I felt embarrassed and then called Jaffna Control, and they answered immediately. I gave our position and ETA and requested weather and landing instructions. Clearance was received to land on runway 22. The Controller’s voice was familiar and I asked, “Is that you Nada?” “Yes Siri, I am Nada, where were you all these years, so nice to hear you.”

Approaching Jaffna, I was surprised to see at a distance the glare of a well-lit city like Singapore glistening in the night. I told the captain, “I feel we are approaching some strange airport and this can’t be Jaffna I knew!” He laughed. “You should see Jaffna Airport and the city now.” We landed and taxied to a huge modern busy airport terminal. JAFFNA INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT in huge letters glowed above the buildings and in Tamil too.

The passengers and the crew disembarked. ‘I said to myself, Good Lord! This is fantastic and strange to me.’ As we entered the Arrival Gate, I was greeted warmly by the Airport Manager, my good old friend, Reggie Santiapillai. “Hello Siri, where have you been all these years? “I told him “I was with KLM flying the North Atlantic and this is my first flight to this region after ages.” He said, “That’s great Siri, I am glad the flight was diverted to Jaffna and not to Lonkok.” “What? Are you referring to Bangkok?” I asked highly amused. “No Siri, the Chinese took over Mattala Rajapaksa International Airport on a ninety-nine years lease for nonpayment of loans and developed it to international standards and changed its name. It is a very busy airport now, busier than BIA”. I was in fits of laughter at this funny name.

Soon, a number of my Tamil friends whom I knew at KKS in the 1950 surrounding me, Customs and Immigration Officers Siva, Raja, Airport Controller Nada, Traffic Officers Fitch, Shakespeare, Panchalingam etc., to greet me. I asked Reggie, “How did insignificant KKS airfield with only a Control Tower in the 1950s become Jaffna International Airport?” “It’s a long story Siri, I will tell you when we get to the hotel.” I couldn’t believe what I saw. We were in a very busy airport like Croydon.

I expected a coach ride to the city, instead we went by sky-train which was almost supersonic and in 15 minutes we were in the city center. I wondered what happened to the miles and miles of cadjan fences that lined the rugged road in the 1950s from KKS airport to Jaffna town. Huge high-rise buildings well lit and with beautiful avenues lined with large beautiful shops displaying their products in show cases was unbelievable. It reminded me of Bond Street in London, a beautiful metropolis crowded even at this late hour with shoppers and tourists. The crew was booked into Jaffna Hilton an impressive hotel with manicured colorful lawns and walkways, swimming pools. Reggie and I settled down in the cafeteria for a chat and a beer.

“How did all this happen, Reggie?” I asked. He thought for some time and smiled. “Siri, we are now a Federal State. It is called THE FEDERAL STATE OF TAMIL ILLAM.’’ “That’s wonderful news Reggie! Congratulations!! I am so proud and happy you people have at last a Federal State of your own.” “Thank you Siri,” he said. “Can you remember when we were under British Rule, Sinhalese, Tamils, Burghers, Muslims and other ethnic groups were known as Ceylonese. Unfortunately, when Ceylon received Independence in 1948, the majority Sinhalese Governments took control of the country, and named it Sri Lanka, and a Sinhalese Buddhist Country.

Instead of treating all citizens impartially, they treated us Tamils and Muslims as minorities. They thought none other than a Sinhalese Buddhist should rule the country. Two major Sinhala Political Parties formed alternate Governments and for years fought each other for power neglecting the country. Due to this discrimination of Tamils, an uprising lead by Prabhakaran with a gang of terrorist suicide bombers, well-known as LTTLE waged a 30-year war with the governments, which retarded the country’s development and finally in 2009 was destroyed by President Rajapaksa under emergency rule.

It was an ideal opportunity for the Sinhalese and Tamils to shed their differences and unite all Sri Lankans as one prosperous nation, but President Mahinda Rajapaksa and his government ignored that opportunity. The Tamils did not wish the country to be divided and requested to give them at least a Federal State in the north of the country, but the arrogant Sinhalese Governments dismissed it.

President Rajapaksa and his government had great power, and since the war had ended and there was no need for defence spending. He found China the ‘rescuer’ as a bottomless well for borrowing, and got China to build large unwanted project such as Highways, Harbours, Airports, a massive Lotus Tower, dredging the seafloor to build a worthless dream of a Port City, etc., and the country getting into enormous debt while he and his Ministers collected huge commissions.

During General Elections in 2018, Basil Rajapaksa formed a new powerful party named SLPP which came into power with a huge majority. It was a Rajapaksa Government, with Gotabaya as President and Mahinda as Prime Minister. There was mismanagement and when the time came to settle the loans from China, India and Japan, etc., the country was found completely bankrupt. There were no dollars to obtain even the basic requirements such as fuel, medicine and food for the people. People revolted by forming a huge protest rally termed the ‘ARAGALAY’ on the Galle Face Green for a couple of months which compelled the President Gotabaya Rajapaksa to flee the country and the Prime Minister Mahinda Rajapaksa to resign.”

“The Ethnic Tamils and Muslims were greatly depressed with what was happening. The Ethnic Reconciliation proposed by President Ranil Wickremesinghe failed. Their cry was, why should we suffer mismanagement of the country by the corrupt Sinhalese Governments. The country is in severe debt to China and India. The IMF and World Bank were reluctant to help an unstable government and the borrowings were enormous. The country was heading for anarchy. In disgust, they appealed to the United Nations for a Federal State of their own in Sri Lanka.

Considering the chaotic unmanageable state of the country and the imbalanced disparity between the Sinhalese and Tamils, the United Nations passed a Resolution, temporarily dividing the Country into a Northern Territory and a Southern Territory, for a period till they can govern the country by themselves as a united nation. Talks between the creditors India and China on the outstanding debts, came into an arrangement, India to govern the Northern Territory and China to govern the Southern Territory for twenty five years.”

“China appointed a Chinese Governor to rule The Southern Territory and made Colombo similar to Hong Kong. I must say, the Chinese improved the Southern Territory by leaps and bounds, with strict discipline, and Industrialised it with large factories manufacturing farming tractors, motor vehicles, Information Technology, Medicines, Garments etc. Farming too was modernised and soon Rice, Tea, Rubber, vegetables spices found overseas markets earning millions of dollars. Exports dramatically increased and imports drastically reduced with local production. Tourism too expanded rapidly to almost 50 million visitors a year shared by both Territories. The Central Bank stabilized with a continuous steady healthy credit balance in US Dollars. Employment and living standards improved quickly with decent wages. The rupee appreciated equivalent to a US Dollar, a great achievement.”

“In the Northern Territory, the Tamils, Muslims and other ethnic groups adopted the old British Colonial form of Government. India allowed a prominent respected Jaffna Tamil politician to Govern the Territory with an efficient Civil Service. India, Britain, USA, and the European Union came to our aid and built Jaffna International Airport. Jaffna, Mannar, Mullaitivu, Batticaloa became major cities. Very soon ours became highly industrialised with Trincomalee becoming a financial and industrial hub with container terminals, ship building yards, steel factories, car assembly plants, flour mills, fishing, etc. In double quick time our Northern Territory too became a highly successful State in the island. Most of the expatriate Tamils came back with their earnings and expertise and developed the North into what it is now. Trade oriented Universities were established in all our cities since skilled labor was needed for development. Tourism developed very rapidly. Last year we shared almost 50 million tourists with the friendly Southern Territory and permitted free travel between. Successful drilling in the Mannar basin produced oil and gas for our industries and we shared it with the South for development.”

“What about border defense?” I asked Reggie. He replied, “Actually, the North and South have their own police forces. There is no need for border patrol as major crimes such as smuggling narcotics, currency and gold disappeared. After all we were once one nation and now both the North and the South have developed simultaneously and the two governments have cordial relations living side by side. The whole island has developed as the Most Beautiful and Peaceful Country on Earth for trade and tourism. Who knows, someday these Territories may merge as one Nation in one country,” Reggie said with a laugh.

A gentle tap on the door ended the dream with our maid bringing our morning coffee. My wife with a kiss asked me, “Darling, why were you laughing and talking in your sleep?”

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