by Anushka Kahandagamage
The world moves forward, but the challenges women face in Sri Lankan society—whether as visible barriers or as invisible misogyny—are unbelievable. Gender-based violence, in its many (un) structured forms, is deeply ingrained in various aspects of society, including language, politics, economics, religion, media, and even the education system. In She Current, my goal is to shine a light on issues that spark conversation about women in society and provide resources to help individuals unlearn harmful gender stereotypes, ultimately working towards a society that is equitable for all genders.
Recently, there was news about the first all-female-staffed hotel in Sri Lanka, which attracted much attention on social media. What was even more interesting, however, was how this news sparked many negative comments. Some of them were: ‘Is the hotel named Sunday Market? The rule that the customer is always right doesn’t apply here. Who would maintain the machinery? Who built the hotel? Why is there a gender-restricted institution? Isn’t that discriminatory? Toxic feminism. If there is a place where only women are present, that place will be a disaster. Is it a lesbian hotel?’ and many more.
All these comments suggest how Sri Lanka society sees women in general and how they are being discriminated against.
Female friendly hotels are gaining prominence in the world as there is a significant increase in female solo travellers. These hotels have emerged as a solution for the challenges faced by female solo travellers, creating a safe and empowering space where they can also meet like-minded women from all around the world. The negative buzz created around this ‘women only’ endeavour is a big talk for a country which is based on tourism, and gradually crawling out from bankruptcy and maintained a huge military (predominantly male) for ages from dollars earned from the labour of female garment factory workers and tea plantations which is run predominantly by female workers.
The negative attention surrounding this ‘women-only’ initiative kind of ‘wise’ conversation you would expect from a country which heavily relies on tourism, with increased female solo traveller population and an economy, including a large military force (predominantly male), long sustained by the labour of female workers in garment factories and tea plantations.
The use of the term ‘Sunday market’ as an insult is built upon certain discourse around the female street vendors called vaṭṭi amma. The term is often directed at women who are outspoken or assertive, carrying with it an underlying implication that they belong to a lower social class. In this context, ‘Sunday market’ is employed to criticize women-run businesses as ‘unorganised.’. And also, positioning these women outside the realm of the ‘civilised’ and ‘passive’ qualities traditionally expected of a ‘pious’ woman, who are considered suitable as marriage partners. When women step outside their expected gender roles – whether by speaking up, being independent or running business – they are often labeled as ‘bad’ women. The insult implies that women who deviate from these norms are somehow less refined or respectable, according to the criteria set by Victorian and middle-class values, and their assertiveness is viewed as a transgression. In a similar comment, it is stated that, ‘If there is a place where only women are present, that place will be a disaster,’ overlooked the fact that, despite the Sri Lankan parliament being predominantly male dominated, the country faced a severe economic crisis and ended up bankrupt. This comment too carries how women are not capable of organised business and rational thinking, which are embedded misconceptions in the society.
This comment—Why is there a gender-restricted institution? Isn’t that discriminatory?’—highlights the lack of awareness about gender issues in society and how people dismiss discussions on feminism, assuming it’s solely about women. The discrimination women faced is historical. While men are considered complete humans, women were often considered as second to them or in a more political sense, considered second citizens. Women had to face many challenges even to have the right to vote, own property or be employed.
Thus, it is simplistic and shallow to state that ‘it is discriminatory for males, as this is a gender-restricted institution.’ As mentioned earlier, the discrimination women have faced for centuries still exists in many forms, and these types of gender-restricted spaces are not meant to discriminate against men but to level the playing field of gender inequality. Empowerment of women does not come at the expense of discriminating against men; rather, it seeks to level a gender field that has been uneven for women and other sexual minorities for centuries.
Finally, the individual who commented ‘toxic feminism’ shows the significant lack of gender education within the society. Feminism does not promote one gender over another; rather, it is an effort to create a world that is sensitive to all genders. In its primary sense, feminism questions the patriarchal structures that limit all genders, including men. Patriarchal structures confine men to high-risk employment, obstruct their ability to express emotions, and contribute to issues such as depression and high suicide rates. One should not equate feminism with toxic masculinity; instead, it presents an ideology that advocates for all genders to live their lives as they choose, free from societal discrimination. Feminism, therefore, is not about demonising men or promoting female dominance; it is about questioning and dismantling the harmful gender norms that restrict everyone
Finally, the subtle existence of gender stereotypes in society and how they create misogynistic and unsafe spaces for women—even in the news—provokes serious concern. When we see a simple tagline like ‘all women staff’ attracting such intense negativity, it forces us to reflect on the broader, more insidious realities that women face on a daily basis. Women who venture into the world—whether they are solo female travellers, garment factory workers, tea pluckers, or parliamentarians—face verbal, physical, and mental threats in the real world, making it feel like a minefield filled with constant dangers. Women are often forced to remain hyper-aware of their surroundings, constantly evaluating the risks of every situation, from choosing where to stay to deciding which streets to walk down. The idea of being ‘safe’—a concept many take for granted—is, for women, often an illusion.
Anushka Kahandagamage recently completed her PhD at School of Social Sciences, University of Otago.
